The Sexuality Snare, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Skull

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to get love, and males utilize love to get sex." This is a excellent summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles translate good sex as love. However those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further because for these songs, having sex brings enormous meaning and effects.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they believe sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will be great also).

B.more commonly, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, instead of taking a look at whether this other individual might be a match on levels aside from physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with reality when all those hormones are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone ( boosts sexual desire), makings the opportunity to have sex with somebody we are drawn in to incredibly tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and involuntary , causing effective sensations of attraction, excitement, nearness, love, and wellness .

But when problems occur, those who fall under the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is fantastic!" They more than likely would not confess, however they focus on physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their main scouting tools are sexual destination and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI click for source coach who works mainly with gay guys, says that a number of his customers have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys especially in city areas, sex is easily offered, which in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical look, motivates sex. Numerous gay guys desire to learn from the beginning if a potential partner is going to be sexually suitable. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be great?".

North adds, "I believe this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do want to mention that chemistry is important. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry occur, though in some cases it can grow over time.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication disappears and reality hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you must balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This means combining chemistry with good sense. While great sex is very important for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner choices by paying full focus on your vision, requirements, values, and objectives -- while feeling all those exciting triggers!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Comments on “The Sexuality Snare, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Skull”

Leave a Reply

Gravatar